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The Porcupine's Quill:  A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
December 1, 2013


News Item:  Traditional since the Kennedy administration, the President pardons a
turkey who moves to quiet retirement.  This year Popcorn was the winning turkey duly
pardoned on Wednesday.

When they first told me I was to be in a turkey contest, I was horrified -- you know
what happens to winners of turkey contests!  I tried my best to lose but kept winning
... winning all the way to the White House.  What an end for Popcorn I thought  ....

It was an imposing ceremony.  They had prepared an elaborate sacrificial altar.  
Looking at it, as you can imagine, I was scared.  But I told myself, it's a lot better than
an abattoir, so stand straight, and take it like a proud member of the turkey race ...
who make the ultimate sacrifice every year.

And it was the ultimate insider, the white-inside, black-outside guy leading the
ceremony.  Yes, we turkeys watch TV.  I remember when young Trayvon was killed
pointlessly, just because he was black, by the scary guy who's now in trouble for
beating up his girlfriend.  Well, I remember the same chief honcho saying he
experienced this sort of fear and people crossing the street to avoid him when he was
a young man.

An' you know what I'm thinkin':  Now that he's an older black guy, he's gone and got
himself a gang, a military, drones an' all, an' the whole world's afraid of him.

He is dressed in black top to bottom:  black shoes, black pants, black overcoat, black
scarf.  He is the executive.  He executes.  And he is coming toward me.  Man, he's a
gutsy one ... going to use his bare hands -- the old fashioned way, the quick pull and
twist.  They have placed me on the altar.  I close my eyes and stand erect.

And, am I surprised!  A change for my kind; I am spared.  Well, the man did say he
liked 'change' ...