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The Porcupine's Quill:  A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
November 12, 2017


News Item:  Donald Trump has been strutting about in East Asia proclaiming his
'America First' doctrine.

Once upon a time there was an ostrich.  Now this ostrich had ostrich feathers, even
of the kind favored by fan dancers.  It was large and had a privileged place among

But it was not satisfied ...

Look at my plumage, it cried.  And look at that peacock.  Now there's a fan if ever
there was one.  It dazzles my eyes.  That's what I want.

He was warned it was a dangerous notion.  But he wouldn't listen.  The peacock can
fly, they said.  You cannot.

With those feathers I could become the most amazing, the most incredible ostrich in
the world ...  the greatest ostrich the world has ever seen.

So he started to take extra care of his feathers.  He dyed them in flaming color.  
Unfortunately for him, the feathers would grow a certain length, then stop growing
and fall off.  Frustrated, he began to plot and scheme.

Listen my friends, why don't you help me become the greatest ostrich in the world,
and when I am, I will help you.  Gather all the shed peacock feathers if you can, and
pull them off a peacock if you must.

So the feathers were collected and his friends glued them on the best they could.  
The glue and the feathers were heavy and he could no longer run very fast but he
walked in stately fashion.  When he fanned the feathers, he looked magnificent.

One day as he was strutting about, he caught the eye of a curious leopard.  His
friends were able to run away, scurrying in different directions.  But the feathers were
too heavy for the ostrich-peacock and the leopard enjoyed a tasty change of diet.

Moral:  Vain ignorance brings disaster.