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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
November 8, 2015
THE FLYING DRAGON
News item: The Chinese rolled out their first commercial jet, the C-919, to be sold
internationally within two years after flight tests.
So, you have learned to fly.
We all have to adapt in a changing world.
When will you be ready for clones to be made and sold to international carriers?
Oh, that will take awhile ... about two years. You see, I have to get my FLIP-FLOPs.
Flip-flops! You are not going to walk; you're going to fly.
You don't understand. These are certificates ensuring I am air worthy. The pilots
and producers certify us -- you know the Federations of Land-animals International
Pilots and Land Organism Producers.
Oh I see. Have you taken to the air yet?
Well, I am fire-breathing and my engines produce a lot of hot air. So I take a lot of
hot air and blow out even more.
No, no. What I mean is, have you started flying yet?
Well, almost. My wings are smooth and clean, and I promise a flight in harmony with
nature. But truth be told, I haven't flown yet. But I will, I will ... very, very soon.
Chinese dragons will be all over the skies.
Provided your FLIP is not a flop and you don't get FLOP-bot ...
No chance of that. We are well made, and if I may say so, FLOP-bot is a western
problem caused by decadent western toilets that the users consider a library. We
dragons have a saying: Do it on the fly. And ...
Yes ...
Have you noticed, there are millions and millions of flying creatures and you seldom
get spattered. It takes training before FLIP-FLOP certification ...
THE FLYING DRAGON
News item: The Chinese rolled out their first commercial jet, the C-919, to be sold
internationally within two years after flight tests.
So, you have learned to fly.
We all have to adapt in a changing world.
When will you be ready for clones to be made and sold to international carriers?
Oh, that will take awhile ... about two years. You see, I have to get my FLIP-FLOPs.
Flip-flops! You are not going to walk; you're going to fly.
You don't understand. These are certificates ensuring I am air worthy. The pilots
and producers certify us -- you know the Federations of Land-animals International
Pilots and Land Organism Producers.
Oh I see. Have you taken to the air yet?
Well, I am fire-breathing and my engines produce a lot of hot air. So I take a lot of
hot air and blow out even more.
No, no. What I mean is, have you started flying yet?
Well, almost. My wings are smooth and clean, and I promise a flight in harmony with
nature. But truth be told, I haven't flown yet. But I will, I will ... very, very soon.
Chinese dragons will be all over the skies.
Provided your FLIP is not a flop and you don't get FLOP-bot ...
No chance of that. We are well made, and if I may say so, FLOP-bot is a western
problem caused by decadent western toilets that the users consider a library. We
dragons have a saying: Do it on the fly. And ...
Yes ...
Have you noticed, there are millions and millions of flying creatures and you seldom
get spattered. It takes training before FLIP-FLOP certification ...