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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
September 15, 2019
GOLF SNACK
News Item: Trump has now spent more time in golf clubs than any other president.
Why is it that you have two caddies Mr. President?
Oh, there is a good reason for that, I did not want to deny myself on the golf course
any longer.
Deny yourself what sir, you're already enjoying golf?
You'll see (sets up and drives the ball). I think I am ready (nods to the new caddie
who is carrying a large box in front of him with a robust strap around his neck)
As he walks towards his ball, Trump explains: The idea came to me in the bath while I
was playing with my favorite ducky. I would hold it under and it would pop right up.
That's like a toaster.
I thought cook does that. Anyway, I have this gizmo (takes his next shot and
continues) with two very small pop-up machines and battery-powered heaters. Smart
isn't it? That's why I'm president, not Hillary.
Popping up noises come from the box and the caddie comes up to the president.
Ah! Thank you! Am I ready for it ...
Why it's a CHEESEBURGER!
Of course, bite-sized. Melania wants me to lose weight. But she doesn't know. I
have one after every hole, heh! heh! chuckles as he eats ...
GOLF SNACK
News Item: Trump has now spent more time in golf clubs than any other president.
Why is it that you have two caddies Mr. President?
Oh, there is a good reason for that, I did not want to deny myself on the golf course
any longer.
Deny yourself what sir, you're already enjoying golf?
You'll see (sets up and drives the ball). I think I am ready (nods to the new caddie
who is carrying a large box in front of him with a robust strap around his neck)
As he walks towards his ball, Trump explains: The idea came to me in the bath while I
was playing with my favorite ducky. I would hold it under and it would pop right up.
That's like a toaster.
I thought cook does that. Anyway, I have this gizmo (takes his next shot and
continues) with two very small pop-up machines and battery-powered heaters. Smart
isn't it? That's why I'm president, not Hillary.
Popping up noises come from the box and the caddie comes up to the president.
Ah! Thank you! Am I ready for it ...
Why it's a CHEESEBURGER!
Of course, bite-sized. Melania wants me to lose weight. But she doesn't know. I
have one after every hole, heh! heh! chuckles as he eats ...