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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
September 8, 2019
MAURICE
News Item: Court rules in favor of Maurice the cockerel
(https://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-49593954). The rooster can continue to
crow at dawn.
Nervous? Of course I was nervous. These neighbors wanted me to become coq au
vin.
Well, their lawsuit only asked for you to stop crowing.
I can't. It's a natural urge that I cannot resist. But isn't this the country of Liberte,
Equalite, Fraternite,. What happened to my Liberte?
Well, that's what the case was about.
Why me though. Can't those old buzzards next door get themselves earplugs? I am
just getting those lazy hens of mine to get to work.
Couldn't you crow a little softer?
Softer! Softer! That's sacrilege. An insult. I am proud of my lungs, proud of my
sound. And the hens know it. You don't want them to become ashamed of me?
No, no, no, Monsieur Maurice. I wasn't thinking.
If you don't mind me saying so, that's the problem with a lot of humans. You could
learn much from us: up at the crack of dawn, hard workers, my hens laying eggs for
you and I'm doing my bit without complaining of working hours.
I must admit I've never thought of you that way.
There you see. In this little conversation you have twice admitted you weren't
thinking ...
I never thought of that ...
There you go again. Let me give you a fond farewell (pumps his chest out and
delivers a full, loud crow).
MAURICE
News Item: Court rules in favor of Maurice the cockerel
(https://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-49593954). The rooster can continue to
crow at dawn.
Nervous? Of course I was nervous. These neighbors wanted me to become coq au
vin.
Well, their lawsuit only asked for you to stop crowing.
I can't. It's a natural urge that I cannot resist. But isn't this the country of Liberte,
Equalite, Fraternite,. What happened to my Liberte?
Well, that's what the case was about.
Why me though. Can't those old buzzards next door get themselves earplugs? I am
just getting those lazy hens of mine to get to work.
Couldn't you crow a little softer?
Softer! Softer! That's sacrilege. An insult. I am proud of my lungs, proud of my
sound. And the hens know it. You don't want them to become ashamed of me?
No, no, no, Monsieur Maurice. I wasn't thinking.
If you don't mind me saying so, that's the problem with a lot of humans. You could
learn much from us: up at the crack of dawn, hard workers, my hens laying eggs for
you and I'm doing my bit without complaining of working hours.
I must admit I've never thought of you that way.
There you see. In this little conversation you have twice admitted you weren't
thinking ...
I never thought of that ...
There you go again. Let me give you a fond farewell (pumps his chest out and
delivers a full, loud crow).