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The Porcupine's Quill:  A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
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the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
August 28, 2016


News Item:  US Olympic swimmer Ryan Lochte lied to Brazilian police about being
robbed when in fact he had vandalized a bathroom at a service station, and been
made to pay for it by its security personnel.

I am just a Brazilian Dogo -- a simple dog so I do not understand human ways.  But
what sense is there in all these people coming here to run and jump and swim.  They
want to run fast when they have cars, even a bicycle is faster.  And they are throwing
spears when they have nuclear bombs.

Of course humans have to play like we like to also.  But this is not play.  They work
themselves to death to win, even take poisons.  I know winning can mean a lot of
money.  The finishing times are so close sometimes, anyone else could have won.  A
bit quicker at the start, might do it, and no one feels the same every day -- some
days we are fresher and full of vim and vigor, other days not!

Well, there it is ... someone else could have won on a different day ...

And the way they are treated ... they begin to think they can get away with anything
... like an undisciplined dog ...

So having won some medals he decides to trash a bathroom, break down the door
and then lie about it.

Panderopathy that's what it is.  It's the disease of the day.  Too much pandering and
no tough questions by reporters even after the vandalism.

So this swimmer is like a spoiled dog.  Don't blame the dog, blame the owner.

I am sorry he lost his endorsements but he couldn't even give a decent apology.  No
doubt he'll hire a PR firm and before you know it, he'll be selling bathroom repair and
remodeling kits!