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The Porcupine's Quill:  A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
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the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
August 23, 2020


News Item:  The Democratic ticket of Joe Biden and Kamala Harris was officially
endorsed at the Democratic Convention.

You did it my daughter, you did it.  Now just a heartbeat away from the presidency
and ...

But Mother, you are dea--ad ...

I had to come back.  I had to ... just to let you know I am so proud of you ... to stand
beside you when you win and take the oath of office.

But Mother, you forget the election.  And you can't.  They'll think I am some kind of
witch to bring you back from the de--a--ad.  I can't even say it.

Then don't.  And don't worry, no one else will see me, only you.

Won't they feel you like I can.  Just a chilly feeling ...

Just be grateful it's not a warm feeling from the other place.  And be careful, mind, all
of this doesn't go to your head or you'll end up in that other place and I'll never see

How is it mother .., up in that place?

Oh, you can get tired of all that milk and honey.  You haven't got some bourbon by
any chance?

Oh, Mother!  You know as a practising Hindoo I don't touch alcohol.

Who told you that?  That's Muslims dear.  Hindus drink like fish.  and so do the
Muslims when no one's looking.  Just go to India, you'll see.  Improperly distilled
homemade hooch often kills hundreds.  And the rich love that square bottle ...  
Makes life bearable dear ... that's the real world.  Sure, you haven't got something
stashed away?