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The Porcupine's Quill:  A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
August 11, 2013


News Item:  Senator Elizabeth Warren (D) and John McCain (R) will introduce a bill
to restore the Glass-Steagall Act separating investment and commercial banking.

When you bruise, I am the yellow part.  When you get jaundice, I turn you yellow.  I
love yellow.  It is the color of gold, and I love gold.

I am responsible for lots of things.  Not only am I your yellow streak, but I have served
the public in my other role.  I have made everything my friends touch ... everything
turn to gold.

Yes, I am into the banks ... literally.  The big ones keep getting bigger.  When that
little BB thing -- Brooks ... something -- wanted to control credit derivatives, I sent her
packing.  My friends made a packet.

Oh, but I forgot to mention ... I also got rid of that Glass-Steagall thing.  Yeah, that's
how everyone joined the party.  It was too good to miss, so I jumped the public ship --
it was going to run aground anyway .. Heh! Heh!

I can't help it ... I love yellow -- all $126 million of it ... my share from the biggest
shipwreck the S.S. Citi.  Well, that's what the public is for ... help us refloat the thing.

We think of life before BC -- my pal who helped us ... and we helped him!! -- and
after BC.  Before ... yes there was plenty of yellow ... but after .... my! my! my!!!  We
are swimming in it ... and so is he -- we take care of our friends.

Yeah, we are swimming in it ... especially since we got BO -- sounds like a bad smell
eh?  No, he's pretty good.  Thinks I am God!  What could be better ... the party is still
on.  Yellow, yellow, yellow ...

We all live in a yellow submarine ... ta, da, da, dah, ta, da ...