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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
August 2, 2015
THE HILL-BILLIES
News Item: Hillary Clinton's emails -- from her special server rather than the secure
State Department one -- are in the news again. She had said she never sent
sensitive materials but quite a few of the emails released have been classified as too
sensitive for public knowledge and censored.
Emails! emails! emails! That's all they talk about. Why can't they leave us alone,
Bill?
Oh, I feel your pain, Hill. I really do.
That's all you say. Why can't you do something about it, Bill? I stood by you ...
through cigars, the Oval Office and that awful girl. It's your turn. Billy ...
Yes, yes, I know ... an' I feel your pain ...
Stop saying that!
Okay, okay. I thought you were past these PMS tantrums ...
I said, what are you going to do?
Just say the censor is an overcautious nanny, Hill. It'll quiet 'em down for a while.
Meantime, I have a date ... er ... a speaking engagement ... must keep the money
rollin' in for your campaign, or you'll get serious opposition ... not just looney Bernie.
I'm happy to have him. Makes it look like a real contest, doesn't it?
Well, a contest at any rate (looking at his watch). Now I've gotta go ...
Okay, promise you will behave yourself ...
Don't I always ... promise, I mean. Oh, it'll be good to get back into the old place
again. Another eight years and we'll have lived there longer than anywhere else.
Mind, behave yourself this time ...
Oh, that's all in the past (looks down at his watch anxiously) ...
THE HILL-BILLIES
News Item: Hillary Clinton's emails -- from her special server rather than the secure
State Department one -- are in the news again. She had said she never sent
sensitive materials but quite a few of the emails released have been classified as too
sensitive for public knowledge and censored.
Emails! emails! emails! That's all they talk about. Why can't they leave us alone,
Bill?
Oh, I feel your pain, Hill. I really do.
That's all you say. Why can't you do something about it, Bill? I stood by you ...
through cigars, the Oval Office and that awful girl. It's your turn. Billy ...
Yes, yes, I know ... an' I feel your pain ...
Stop saying that!
Okay, okay. I thought you were past these PMS tantrums ...
I said, what are you going to do?
Just say the censor is an overcautious nanny, Hill. It'll quiet 'em down for a while.
Meantime, I have a date ... er ... a speaking engagement ... must keep the money
rollin' in for your campaign, or you'll get serious opposition ... not just looney Bernie.
I'm happy to have him. Makes it look like a real contest, doesn't it?
Well, a contest at any rate (looking at his watch). Now I've gotta go ...
Okay, promise you will behave yourself ...
Don't I always ... promise, I mean. Oh, it'll be good to get back into the old place
again. Another eight years and we'll have lived there longer than anywhere else.
Mind, behave yourself this time ...
Oh, that's all in the past (looks down at his watch anxiously) ...