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The Porcupine's Quill:  A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
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the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
June 17, 2018


News Item:  The World Cup 2018 began in Russia.

Hi Vladimir!  I thought we were friends.

And so we are Donald.  How are you?

Hey, don't try to soft soap me.  I'm a businessman.

So what's the trouble?

Trouble!   Why should there be trouble.  You are having the world football
championships and we are not invited.

Invited?  I can't invite you.  The organizers do that and the US team was not good

Good enough!  What are you talking about?  We have the best football teams in the

No,no,no!  You are talking American football.  This is different ...  played with a round
ball like your basketball.

What kind of football is that?

Well, it's played without touching the ball with your hands.  The players mostly kick it
around and score a goal by kicking it into a goal with posts and a net..

Sounds screwy to me.  Every game we play, players handle the ball.

Don't ask me.  Ask your friend Theresa May.  The English invented it.

I can believe it.  They have another game ... goes on for days with lunch breaks and
tea breaks.

Yes, they call it cricket.

Yeah, now you mention it, Theresa was saying it wasn't cricket when I wouldn't join in
the G7 declaration.  Didn't know what she was talking about.  Nice to talk to you
Vlad.  Good luck with the championship.

Nice to talk to you too, and thanks.  Bye Donald.