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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
April 26, 2020
BLUE BLOODED PRESIDENT
News Item: In his daily coronavirus update, President Trump said he was asking
doctors to test injecting disinfectant as a cure for COVID-19. He later claimed it was
satire although it did not appear so. Thereafter, he also stopped regular daily
appearances claiming fake news media misinforms the public.
Doughnaald, how could you do this? It'll cost you in November.
Listen Melania, someone wrote to me and it seemed to make sense ...
It would to you, I suppose ...
You know, I've always been envious of those blue-blooded royals and I thought blue
blood would be nice.
Like a horseshoe crab ...
Okay, okay, so I made a mistake. I still think there is something there. You know,
soap breaks the fat film holding the virus molecules together and they disperse
What! You want to inject soap now. Tell you what TIDE will certainly turn your blood
No, no, no! I have had enough of injections. I am thinking of eating the stuff for the
You know what I think ... you had better stop going to those daily coronavirus
briefings or you won't be in the White House next year.
Don't worry. That plagiarizing, pusillanimous, son-pushing, pussy chasing,
plastic-surgeried excuse for a candidate needs to be in a nursing home.
It won't be that easy, Doughnaald.
You just watch, Melania, I know how to win elections ...