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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
February 7, 2021
SETTLING INTO RETIREMENT
New Item: Trump Tower in Chicago violates environmental laws by sucking massive
amounts of water from the Chicago River without a valid permit.
Damn, I forgot that one.
You forget golf club, Doughnaald?
No, no, Melania. I was thinking of my building in Chicago and environmental laws.
Environment is important, Doughnaald ...
Yes, yes, yes, Melania but not when it hurts profits.
But I thought you leave business to children.
And children, they are not telling me about this while I was president.
(Coquettishly) You always president with me ...
Not before breakfast, Melalnia. I am hungry.
I was going to have a coffee get-together today with some of the women. You know,
get all the gossip. You want to stay?
What? With those women? I am playing golf.
Maybe, if I ask them to bring their daughters ...
You know, maybe I can stay. And you know I could give golf lessons to the
daughters. You know how much I like to help young people ...
I know, Doughnaald. I change my mind. I think I'll have a quiet read. Both of us
together.
Read! Me, read! I had enough of that in four years at the White House. Why, I was
so sick of it, I had to employ someone to read for me.
I know, the young blonde. I think I'll order you a cheeseburger with plenty of cheese.
It will settle you down ...
SETTLING INTO RETIREMENT
New Item: Trump Tower in Chicago violates environmental laws by sucking massive
amounts of water from the Chicago River without a valid permit.
Damn, I forgot that one.
You forget golf club, Doughnaald?
No, no, Melania. I was thinking of my building in Chicago and environmental laws.
Environment is important, Doughnaald ...
Yes, yes, yes, Melania but not when it hurts profits.
But I thought you leave business to children.
And children, they are not telling me about this while I was president.
(Coquettishly) You always president with me ...
Not before breakfast, Melalnia. I am hungry.
I was going to have a coffee get-together today with some of the women. You know,
get all the gossip. You want to stay?
What? With those women? I am playing golf.
Maybe, if I ask them to bring their daughters ...
You know, maybe I can stay. And you know I could give golf lessons to the
daughters. You know how much I like to help young people ...
I know, Doughnaald. I change my mind. I think I'll have a quiet read. Both of us
together.
Read! Me, read! I had enough of that in four years at the White House. Why, I was
so sick of it, I had to employ someone to read for me.
I know, the young blonde. I think I'll order you a cheeseburger with plenty of cheese.
It will settle you down ...