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The Porcupine's Quill:  A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
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the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
December 15, 2019


News Item:  The Labour Party in the UK loses heavily to the Conservatives in the
December 12 election.

I thought Shakespeare called it, Love's Labour's Lost.

He did but I am talking about the election defeat, not his play.

Oh!  You mean Boris Johnson leading the Tories to whip Jeremy Corbyn's Labour


That was a surprise.  He's a clown.

Boris may clown around like taking his dog when he went to vote ...

Smart move.  He may clown around but he's no fool.  The dog's cute, and he didn't
want to remind voters of his live-in girl friend by taking her like others taking their

Indeed!  Not many people know but he was a King's Scholar at Eton ... passed the
exams to become one.

Yep he was ... they call them tugs, you know.  Maybe they tugged his hair so much
he can't comb it.  Any idea why Labour lost so badly.

Well, for one they talked about the National Health Service when the elephant in the
room was Brexit.

So Brexit it is, and the UK out of the EU by January 31, 2020.

It's a Gordian knot with the Irish border problems, and trade negotiations that could
last a couple of years ...

You mean the Irish don't want a border between north and south now they are used
to not having one.

They certainly do not.  And it all started with a referendum ...

Why this can of worms when the UK is a representative democracy?

Ask the idiot who held the referendum.  He, too, was an  Etonian!