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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
December 13, 2020
WHERE THERE'S HOPE
News Item: Trump still refuses to concede hoping the electors will reverse their
mandates and vote for him.
Well Doughnaald, can I start packing?
No, no! Not yet, Melania. Have some patience. . .
Patience for what, Doughnaald. We have to leave.
I am telling you, Melania. I won, and the electors will vote for me on December 14.
All right then. That's tomorrow. I suppose I can wait another day, Doughnaald. But
I'm worried . . .
Oh you needn't, Melania. I won, and the electors will side with me. You'll see.
It'll be a miracle . . .
Yes, Melania. A miracle in the season of miracles.
There you go again, and I am worried . . .
I am telling you, Melania. It will be an amazing victory. . . a fantastic and beautiful
thing. Yes Melania, victory is beautiful. I love to win.
I know you do. That's why I am worried.
Don't, Melania. I've won and we will not be moving from the White House.
That's what I am worried about . . . You refusing to go and the marshals coming to
drag you out -- a giant of a man being pulled out of the White House like a beached
whale . . . and the TV cameras buzzing away. . . and us on the evening news . . .
We've been on the news before, Melania . . .
But not this way. We'll be a laughing stock . . .
It's better the people laugh than they cry, Melania.
Oh, Doughnaald! I afraid you lose your mind . . .
No, Melania and just to prove it . . . will you get me a large CHEESEBURGER with
everything and don't skimp on the CHEESE . . .
Oh, Doughnaald!!