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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
December 9, 2012
THE FLYING GRASSHOPPER
News Item: Senator Jim DeMint announces he will leave the Senate to head the
Heritage Foundation, a conservative think tank.
Creme de Mint, or as he himself says Creme de la Creme de Mint considers
himself a founding member of the Tee Party. Yes, it's those fanatic golfers
Not only is Creme de Mint a founding member but he is the foundation of the
glue that binds the group -- the Flying Grasshopper.
Who says I am not open-minded? Creme is reported to have said. I am
white; I have a green twin, and together with my Russian friend Vodka de
Smirnoff, we make an unbeatable combination -- The Flying Grasshopper.
If you thought the Flying Fortress was powerful, think again. We can blow
your socks off. So, why do you think we are so popular with the Tee Party.
We are there at every hole and those Tee Partyers are flying ... flying
grasshoppers by the 18th.
That was when someone offered me the job of heading a think tank. Now if
there was any actual thinking at this particular tank, I'd be in trouble.
No, I am going to be fine. They are fellow travelers -- flying grasshoppers --
and I'll be fine.
Sure beats the millionaire, vainglorious, preening peacocks in that boring
Senate club ...