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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
November 5, 2017
News Item: Indictments in the Russian case lead to the Trump campaign. President
takes off on a long Asian trip.
I love turkeys ... I mean hen turkeys. I like to peck 'em in the ...
Yes, yes. About this trip. Do you think you can fly that long. You know very well
turkeys are no longer what they used to be. I mean, look at yourself for example ... a
little too plump if you ask me.
Nobody asked you. If you don't watch your tongue ... remember it's November and ...
. Anyhow, I am the biggest turkey there is ... amazing ... incredible, what I've done ...
Yes, yes, yes. But why do you have to go?
Don't you know. It's like every big cheese before me. I have to boost my poll ratings,
or I too will end up you know where ...
Oh, I hate this November through December season. It makes me a nervous wreck.
Don't worry. I promise to pardon you.
That's some consolation ... coming from a dead duck.
I am not a duck. And I am not dead ... not yet.
So you're off ... with your hen with the stork legs. It'll be hard for her to fly that far.
The storks do it. So can she.
So what are you going to do there.
Oh, all a big turkey leader does. I'll wow them with my plumage, my power. You know
very well I am the biggest turkey in the whole world. I'll keep faith with all the turkeys
who voted for me ...