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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
October 12, 2014
ZING FROM ZETA
News Item: The Nobel Peace Prize was awarded this week to 17-year old Malala
Yusufzai from Pakistan and Kailash Satyarthi, a 60-year old Indian children's rights
You are an odd shape Zing. What are you?
Well I am a middle of the road species on our planet ... something like your dogs here
But you drive a spaceship ... and you communicate.
It just so happens we are all far ahead of you. It's what you might call computer
magic ... and brain development across species.
What do you think of us?
I think it is amazing a 17-year old girl can be a world leader for peace. Is it a last
What do you mean?
The leader of your most powerful nation was honored the same way was he not? He
is on to attacking his seventh country now, just in excess of one Muslim country per
year in office, and his policies have harmed millions of people. Look at all the
refugees streaming across borders everywhere he has been. You have a long way
to go ...
Could our dogs become as smart as you?
They almost are … at least they don't pick fights thousands of miles away, or tell
falsehoods constantly to deceive for gain.
Any species you like?
The bonobos by far. They are the ones who need to be rewarded and developed. I
am taking some back with me.
An alien abduction?
Well, really alien education, and brain development. When we send them back, they
will rule the world … in peace.
Why don't you take a human? The brain is far more developed ...
And warped! No hope there, sad to say ...