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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
September 20, 2020
News Item: A Supreme Court seat has to be filled after the liberal Ruth Bader
Ginsburg passed away this week.
Will you be maintaining Liberal/Conservative balance on court, Doughnaald?
You need to keep out of this, Melania ...
Why I keep out ... I am woman. I want to protect women's rights.
Now listen, Melania ... you stay out of the Oval office, and politics ...
And you listen, Doughnaald ... you appoint one of your right-wing extremist men and
you know what happen ...
It's what will happen, Melania ...
What happen, what will happen. One thing for sure, Doughnaald. You will be locked
out of my bedroom.
Melania! That's below the belt ...
Ja! Below the belt is right Ha! Ha! I like that. You will be eating not one but six
cheeseburgers every night.
You couldn't be that cruel ...
I can, and I will. I come from the Balkans where there have been history figures, like
Vlad the Impaler and Count Dracula.
You can't frighten me. Anyway they were from Romania. Even I know that.
You want to try me out, Doughnaald?
No, no, no! As I was saying, I want a woman to replace the Ginsburg woman.
Good! And don't call her 'the Ginsburg woman'. You wouldn't call the late Justice
Scalia, 'the Scalia man'.
Okay Melania. You win. The late Justice Ginsburg replacement will be a woman. I
promise. Now can I please, please have a CHEESEBURGER ...