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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
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the satire column
August 11, 2019
I FEEL THEIR PAIN
News Item: Bill Clinton is said to have taken a couple of dozen trips aboard Jeffrey
Epstein's private jet, nicknamed the Lolita Express ... going to his Love Island
perhaps -- Epstein is in jail awaiting trial for trafficking underage girls.
I have to tell ya ... I feel their pain ...
You mean the little girls he was trafficking ...
Yes, the poor lovely dears. What a massage, but I feel their pain.
What do you mean, sir?
Well, you know ... I am a very sympathetic person.
Did you ever go to his Love Island?
You know, when you're on a jet and you land on a private strip, and are whisked off
in a limo to a mansion, you can never be sure where you are ... But you know, if
those girls are hurting ... I feel their pain.
You went to Africa on one of his planes ...
Yes, that's right. It was my initiative to improve lives there. You know, I feel their pain.
It's a long trip to Africa. Were there girls for entertainment on board?
Well, there are always girls on a plane ... hostesses and so forth ...
Was anything out of the ordinary going on?
I dunno. Whatever it was, I didn't inhale ...
I am talking about the girls, sir.
Oh, the girls. I tell ya ... I feel their pain ...