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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
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the satire column
August 7, 2011
THE RUTTING CHIMPANZEE
News Item: Dominique Strauss-Kahn known in France as DSK has been
charged with rape in New York, attempted rape in France, and has been
described as a rutting chimpanzee by yet another woman. He was obliged to
resign as IMF Managing Director and is no longer a viable French Presidential
So, what does she expect... aren't chimps swingers? What a lot of fuss
about a hard-wired natural impulse. It's all in the brain. I don't fight it. I
don't beat about the bush. I get right to the point. I am direct. I don't
believe in preliminaries. It's how I got where I am ... er ... was.
What are they complaining about? They didn't complain then. You know
what I think it is ... they couldn't hold me. I am so magnificent -- a silver back
... a chimpanzee with the silver tones of a gorilla in prime. What female can
resist? I ask you. Then I leave and they complain. I can't be everywhere.