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The Porcupine's Quill:  A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
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the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
July 15, 2018


News Item:  The donkey is the symbol of the Democratic Party.  The Russians
hacked Hillary Clinton's email accounts and discovered crookery in her primary
election contest with Bernie Sanders.

Mr. Donkey!  Can I call you Donk or would you prefer Ass?

Donk will be fine.

When you discovered your party chairman and Hillary's collusion and crookery to
beat Bernie sanders, why did you jump on the Russians?

They interfered in our election process.

You mean a crooked election is better than the public learning about a corrupt
Democratic Party.  All the hackers did was to make public emails showing Hillary
colluding with Debbie Wasserman Schultz, who promptly resigned in the middle of
your party convention because Sanders' supporters booed her so much she could
no longer run the convention.

Listen, you enjoy sausage but no one should see how it's made.

You mean you put non-establishment candidates in the meat grinder.

I didn't say that.

Donk, you are pretty smart ...

Go on say it.  Weren't you going to say for a donkey?

You know Donk, you do have gall.  First, you screw up Ukraine, aside from Libya and
Syria and several others.  Then you start a feud with the Russians instead of
cleaning up your party.

Can't, too much money.  Anyway, they took Crimea.

It was theirs to begin with.  You know very well Khrushchev added it to the Ukraine to
ease the administration of a dam.  Why do you want to start a second cold war?

What do you mean?

Are you in ass mode now.   Obama flexes muscle against China, starts trouble in
Ukraine.  Putin and Xi are not that stupid.  They are peeling off our friends and
beating the crap out of us in trade.  Sometimes honey works better than vinegar.

I prefer oats m'self.  Hee!  Haw!