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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
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the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
July 12, 2020
BIDEN RUNS
News Item: Biden gives his big speech on the economy in Dunmore, PA.
I said I'm Biden.
Bidin', what for?
Look I'm Biden, running for president.
You mean bidin' like Kanye West, hangin' around, waiting to put your hat in the ring.
Don't you understand? I'm Joe R. Biden, Jr. I am the official Democratic party
candidate for president. We are the party that works for you people and I want your
support.
Oh! Why dint yer say so? I know. You're the guy pinchin' words from others. Ain't
yer got yer own?
Plenty of 'em. I've been in politics for forty years.
My! My! You been pinchin' a lot then. They all do.
What the hell do you mean?
I mean, you a millionaire now like the rest of 'em. Right? Where you get it?
Listen my good man. We have laws ...
Yeah and they apply 'em to us more 'n to you ...
The laws are applied fairly and equitably to all.
Tell that to George Floyd. Where you been, man. Ain't you listenin' to Black Lives
Matter?
I've been listening all these years. I was a pioneer in the civil rights movement.
That's why I deserve your vote, not Trump.
Who's talkin' about Trump? I'm votin' for Kanye. He's the man. Ma kind of man and
black like me ...