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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
July 5, 2015
THE CHIMP T. RUMP CAMPAIGN
News Item: The backlash from Donald Trump's negative remarks on Mexican
How can you say "some Mexicans" are not rapists and drug dealers and murders? It
implies that most are ...
Just look at what happened this week. Kate Steinle strolling by the pier in San
Francisco with her father, and she is shot and killed by this Mexican immigrant with a
Did the financial backlash from your comments not tell you something?
These people are hypocrites ... can't face the truth ...
Let's set that aside for now and look forward. Suppose you are elected president.
What will you do?
First, I am gonna build a wall ...
You mean like a Great Wall of America ...
Better than that. I'll call it the Trump Wall. And there will be casino towers at frequent
intervals -- Trump Towers Casinos -- where Mexicans and Americans can mingle. I
believe you should meet your neighbors, maybe entertain them, but you don't expect
them to move in with you.
Won't the Mexicans slip in ...
No, no! American entrances will be guarded by the border patrol. But as they say,
there is more ...
What do you mean?
Well, you can't have a state like New Mexico; remember, this is the U.S. of A. The
name 'New Mexico' -- I can't stand it -- needs changing ...
So are you going to call it Americo ...
No, that's confusing. Umm ... much better is Trumpico; it has a certain ring to it. And
California still reminds us of its Mexican occupation. I think Donaldonia sounds much
You mean like Donald Duck.
(Glares) No! like ... like -- this interview is over.