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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
June 22, 2014
News Item: As ISIS (The Islamic State of Iraq and Syria) makes a lightning advance
in Iraq, former Vice President Dick Cheney has written an op-ed in the Wall Street
Journal criticizing Obama's foreign policy as weak, particularly in its failure to act
earlier in Syria.
Have you eaten? In many parts of the world it is a greeting of welcome; in my case, I
admit I'm a coward.
Yes and well. (Snarling impatience and contempt with a twisted lip) What've you
got? I'm busy. (Snarls again).
So you still think America's five-trillion dollar war was the right thing to do?
Yes. (Snarls, this time baring teeth). Better to fight 'em there than over here.
But Saddam was anti al-Qaeda. You were out there chummy chummy with him not
that many years before.
Yeah! He turned. Took Kuwait. Can't rely on any of 'em. Couldn't let it stand.
Should've bombed the hell out of Syria. Obama, I mean, like Libya. Obama doesn't
have it in him. Should never have been President.
But Syria is secular ... fighting the worse-than-al-Qaeda ISIS. Libya was secular.
Now its a chaotic mess of fundamentalists and General Haftar, and the spill-over is
affecting even Nigeria.
Listen! There's us and there's them. Whose side you on?
What about Saudi Arabia?
What about it? It's great for business. Great. Been hunting with some of 'em. Great
guys. (Twisted lip droops, rises in a smile, fangs glisten).
How's the hunting been lately?
Dunno. Can't seem to get a group to come with me these days. (Looks sad).