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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
June 19, 2016
THE HILL-BILLY CHRONICLES
News Item: Hillary Clinton would have husband Bill in charge of 'revitalizing the
economy' if she is elected.
Didn't Ross Perot call it the 'giant sucking sound" of jobs leaving the U.S. for Mexico
Yes, but we generated new jobs.
But the net job losses were high-paying manufacturing jobs?
You know, Bill feels their pain ...
Trump is saying you want him close by to keep an eye on him ...
Can you believe anything he says? Next he'll say Bill wants to be in charge in the
White House intern program ...
Doesn't he? (Gets withering look.)
Bill's too old for those games, and I will be the President. Anyway you can ask him
yourself, he's right here.
Yes, as Hill was saying ... a lot of water has passed under the bridge. It's like ... I use
to love double cheeseburgers, I eat healthy now, I have to.
So how do you plan to revitalize the economy ...
The answer is young people. You know, I have always been drawn to young people,
especially young women for they have been so discriminated against, and, if I may
say so, they to me (gets withering look). So many of them are unemployed ...
well-qualified people not taken care of . That's my job, as I see it, revitalize them
(gets another withering look). I feel their pain and they feel mine .. ahem! We are a
perfect match ...
(Hillary interrupts.) That'll be all for this interview. Thank you. (Bill walks away
humming, 'Happy Days are here again ... ').