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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
June 10, 2012
I AM, SO I CAN
News Item: Reports and leaks confirm President Obama's insistence on his personal
authorization of targets (individuals) for drone attacks.
I am the Grand Ollama chosen by the llamas, burdened with the divine right to rule. I
can do no wrong.
When a llama becomes a threat to us, I have to act. My job is to protect.
Does that llama have rights, you ask, to a proper trial? Well, I decide when his
threats relinquish those rights. I am the Grand Ollama.
What can I do? I have the llamas to protect, and an election to win.
And these are all bad guys. They deserve all they get from us. They are the worst
of the worst and a serious threat.
The others around them who get killed? Yes, I know what you are thinking ... that
they are innocents. You should realize, birds of a feather flock together. That's why
we have started labeling them 'militants' and not civilians. Now, civilian casualties are
at a minimum.
I always bring 'change' as I promised, and the result is 'hope' as I also promised.