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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
May 27, 2012
VOLKSHAMAN AND DEMON
News Item: Articles in various media reveal again Obama's consistent inconsistency,
promising what appears to be radical change in speeches while providing bankers
easy access to shape legislation. Loopholes in the law passed has allowed derivative
trading to continue, and J P Morgan Chase has now suffered a $2 billion loss from it.
The Grand Ollama, leader of the llama folk, and, above all, spiritual guide or shaman,
is often referred to as the Volkshaman of the Andes. He has uniquely promised
everything to everyone. By day his oratorical skills are evident in the stirring
speeches he delivers to his llama folk promising 'change'. In their naivete, they
expect change for the better. That he says takes time. Therefore we must 'hope' for
a better future. 'Change' and 'hope' are the bywords of the Volkshaman, promising
the former and concentrating on the latter as the secret to happiness.
At night, he puts his feet up, and draws on a fine cigar offered by his friend the great
Jamie Demon of Mug an' Chase (or is it Chase an' Mug?).
"Yes," he says, "good cigar, by the way." In an aside to an aide, "These banksters
are savvy guys ... how he gets 'em from Cuba, I don't know. I can't. Political hell
would break loose if I did, and I'd lose Florida.
"Well, you know," says Demon, "now that Ram, Ram, the investment banking man, is
leaving, my chief lobbyist Dilly Daley would be perfect at your right hand."
And so it was, those few years ago. And the Demon got his wish to keep drinking
from the derivative well. Alas, it was a slow-acting poison, and the Demon got a
stomach ache that cost him $2 billion; of course, it could have been a worse
poisoning, and the poor llama folk might have ended up paying for the cure as they
had had to once before. But not this time.
The Grand Ollama continues to offer 'change' and 'hope' ... because 'change' takes