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The Porcupine's Quill:  A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
May 18, 2014

SACRED BULL

News Item:  Narendra Modi's party, the Hindu nationalist BJP wins the Indian election
making him the incoming Prime Minister.

O!  I am in such personal pain ...

Is that because of the killings of minorities Assam?

No ...

Then it must be the killing of Muslims in Bihar or perhaps you still find the pogrom in
Gujarat painful as you say on your website.

No and no ....

Then what is it?

It's my hemorrhoids ... All the travel and irregular schedules.

I didn't know that bulls suffered thus.

Well, yes and I am not a bull; I'm an ox.  Remember I gave up on all that other stuff
when I left my wife and married my work.  I'm devoted 100 percent to service ... of my
country that is.

But I have good news ... Now you can go to America.  They cant keep you out for that
pogrom.  And in
America they sell "Preparation H".

What is that?  'H'?  What I need is a 'C' ... something cold and cooling.  I feel already
burning hot and swollen ... like those monkeys in the zoo displaying distended,
swollen buttocks ...

Oh no, Sir!  It has nothing to do with temperature; it is named after your malady ...

I don't have to go there.  Tell our ambassador in the U.S. to send a large box by
overnight express.  I am his new boss.  And, I know how to be boss.

Yes, sir!  Time and a salve soothes all pain.

Time doesn't help my pain ...