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The Porcupine's Quill:  A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
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the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
April 29, 2018


News Item: The first couple have separate bedrooms -- a first in decades.

What is the secret to your lasting marriage?

I haven't spoken to him in a year.  I didn't want to interrupt. . .

Anything else?

Yes.  Separate bedrooms.  You see, he likes to do his exercises in bed watching TV
... Up, down. Up, down. Up, down.  Then he closes his eye and does the other eyelid.

What do you do?

Oh, I like to keep trim, and I once asked him what happened to his get-up-and-go.  
He said, it went.

Don't you want to do something about his weight?

Well, I've told him if he doesn't stop eating those cheeseburgers in bed, he'll end up
like his Big Aunt Bertha.

What happened to her?

She was lying on the beach one day and the beach patrol asked her to leave.

Why'd they do that?

They said the tide was waiting to come in.

That's unbelievable.

Amazing, yah?

Fantastic ...

See how easy those words come out in the context of this family . . .

I see what you mean.