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The Porcupine's Quill:  A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
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the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
April 26, 2015


News Item:  Barack Obama is trying to fast-track the Trans Pacific Partnership
through the Senate while keeping the text classified.

It doesn't pass the smell test.  Why can't we see the agreement?

Of course you can -- you only have to ask.

Why won't you release the text?  Why is it a secret?

There is no secret.  It's available to you if you ask.

Why is it classified?  I want to be able to discuss it openly ... with constituents, with
journalists, and in Congress before I vote this 'fast-track' to strip our authority to
amend it.

It's a very long text.

I know.  I know.  That's why I want to discuss it.

You only have to ask.

What do you think I'm doing.  The legislative has never been treated this way.

We have been courteous, we are doing everything we can to help.  But you folks
need to get going.

We disagree with your attitude to transparency and so do many journalists and
Members of Congress, and the public we represent ...

The public?  Not the big banks?  You folks just pushed out the exclusion rule for high
risk derivatives from the Dodd-Frank provisions.

And you signed it into law after some double-talk.

That's all water under the bridge.

It'll be a flood over the bridge and wash us all out in a sea of debt obligations with the
next crash.  See how Citi is now loaded up with energy derivatives and the price of oil
is crashing.

Well, get on with the TPP.

It's a B.O. TPP.  It stinks!

I can't help my initials ...