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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
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the satire column
April 19, 2015
TUSHI DOWNS DRONE
News Item: At the Royal Burghers Zoo in the Netherlands, a drone sent to
photograph the chimps' private moments in their spacious enclosure was knocked
out of commission by 23-year old Tushi.
The first question is how did you manage to do it?
Well, it was difficult. It was flying high up. But I fashioned a tool. I had to snap off a
really long branch with a brush-like end to increase my chances. Then, when it came
close, I jumped up and took a swipe. Took a couple of tries before I got a good
whack at it. There you see it on the ground; it's not buzzing any more.
The second question is, of course, why you did it?
Isn't it obvious? Everyone likes their own space. Who likes the intrusion? Yes you
humans have imprisoned us, and I am grateful not to be in a little barred cage as
others of my kind experience, but still, we are entitled to some respect.
You know humans are droning other humans ... sometimes even killing them with
I am not surprised. You humans do a lot of killing. You kill us. You kill other
animals. You kill fellow humans. And most of the time you waste the meat. You kill in
anger. You kill for pleasure. You kill because you consider some creature a pest.
You kill for for all kinds of reasons. And you kill the places where animals live. Soon
little will be left and you will die.
You are a philosopher Tushi ...
There is little else to do. I also spend my time crowd watching. All kinds of interesting
humans come to look at us. If they are curious, so are we ...