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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
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the satire column
April 9, 2017
SHI MEETS PIT BULL
News Item: Chinese leader Xi Jinping is Trump's guest at Mar-a-Lago.
Yes, I am Shi. You may call me a Foo Dog but I am actually a lion.
Doesn't matter. An American pit-bull is not afraid of anybody or anything. I have just
shown that to the Syrians.
We, Shi, do not need to attack anyone. We are quietly peaceful, yet ever watchful.
But we need to talk of many other things, so let us talk.
Yes, first trade ...
Ah, trade. Yes we must, but as you know it is complicated and will need much talk.
What talk? You are screwing us and we need a better balance.
Balance, yes, yes ... that's the secret of life. Balance and harmony in everything. It
brings serenity and peace. It is what we all want. Don't you think?
Yes, yes, but I am talking trade.
So am I. So am I. You know it would be easier if you made things people actually
want to buy. But we'll see what we can do ...
But the trade is so out of whack. We have to do something. I promised my people.
And we will, we will. But whack is a bad word. Balance and harmony is what great
powers must strive for.
Well then, let's get on with it.
Of course we will. Let us say ... about a hundred days for the experts to work things
out. Harmony! Now that is the secret of life ... harmony is what we both want.
Right? Let's keep working on it ...
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