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The Porcupine's Quill:  A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
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the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
April 7, 2019


News Item:  Despite a dozen attempts to get any kind of Brexit deal through
parliament, Prime Minister Theresa May has not given up.  She has asked the EU for
a deadline extension.

So you haven't given up yet, eh?

Of course not.  I'm a British bull terrier, British through and through, and when I get
my teeth into something, you can't pry it loose ...

Even when they give you that nasty black eye?

Even if they give me two nasty black eyes ...

So who did it, Donald Tusk the big Polecat?

Oh, no, no!  He's a sweet lamb chop.  It's my own backyard.

You mean those nasty, barking, fang-baring MPs ...

You got it.

So what's next?

Well, Tusky is going to giving me an extension.  Just to be safe, I've had a word with
my pal the German rottweiler.  What she says goes, you know.

She's scary enough.  I see she's given you a hint about Northern Ireland, visiting the
place, etc.

I know, I know.  I've taken it.  But she's really quite sweet.  They call her Mutti -- Mum
you know.

Well, I'm glad you have her on your side.

She has to be.  They send us most of the EU exports.

People need to stop driving around in all those German cars.

But then what are they going to drive round in?  Even Jaguar has gone to the
Indians.  Our carmakers have all sold out.

What is the world coming to?

What indeed.  A post-industrial economy.  Our capital makes more in financial
services, consulting and such like.  And then we are an arms powerhouse.

Quite so, quite so.  We'll survive.

That we shall.  That we shall.  I say, you don't happen to have something to soothe a
black eye, do you?