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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
March 2, 2014
THE SCHNAUZER AND THE BULLDOG
News Item: Chancellor Merkle visits Britain where Prime Minister Cameron is seeking
some limits on free movement of people/labor in the EU.
Welcome! Willkommen my little Schnauzzi ....
Don't you 'little Schnauzzi' me. We have a power house economy much bigger than
yours and you want favors, not me. It's 'Madam Chancellor' to you.
My apologizes. You looked so ravishing. I got carried away.
Oh, cut it out! I get enough of this from the French poodle. Last time he offered me
a ride on his new motor scooter! Why are you males little pups at heart. Let's get
down to business.
Well, it's this problem with terrible unemployment, you see. And, if I can't do anything
about it, I won't be Prime Minister after the next election. You'll get that commie in a
suit, Miliband ...
Ach! same problem as the French poodle ... can't keep your house in order.
Well, you see it's all these Polish plumbers and Bulgarian waitresses and household
help and farm labor and things ... They are taking all the vacant jobs.
You know your problem ...
You speak English. And the Poles and Romanians and Bulgarians and ... They all
speak English. So they come here.
Change your language to German, Ja? And they stop coming here. Now ... you
have some dinner for me ...