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The Porcupine's Quill:  A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
January 11, 2015


News Item:  Alan Dershowitz, prominent lawyer and Harvard Law School professor
accused of sex with an underage girl in a lawsuit.

Dershy, you dog, didn't know you had it in you ...

Well (looking down) we all have our moments, but (snarls) not this one.  I am going to
sue their socks off.

Hey, calm down.  You can't go to jail as you well know -- the statute of limitations and
all that ...

It's my reputation ...

What reputation?  Now you meshugenah, you have one.  Before you were a
bespectacled little professor, now you are a man ...

Man?  I am so embarrassed.  The students are snickering at me -- though I admit
some of the girls are giving glances of appraisal ...  that's new for sure.

Don't worry it'll blow over.  And you know what ?  You are in the company of princes
...  can't be that bad.

I swear to you I am not guilty.  You know Anita Ekberg died.  La Dolce Vita was ---  I
am at a loss for words --- and she ... oh, a goddess.

Dershy, this is a side of you we have never seen in the common room ...

Well, a man can be more than his parts ...

In your case, one cannot help but agree ... at least you're getting your firteen minutes
of true fame ...