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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
January 7, 2018
News Item: "Fire and Fury' is published. It purports to show an idiot president and a
dysfunctional White House.
Listen, I am me, and I am every man.
They say I am an idiot. It's been said before.
They say I don't read. Neither do the American people.
So, I start yawning when they explain how the economy works. So would the
But look at what's happened: the stock market's hitting new highs and the
unemployment is at the lowest in a gazillion years.
They say I sit in bed and eat a MacDonald's cheeseburger. So, I like fast food. So
does the American public.
So I watch three TVs. That's cos I am 'like, very smart'. The American public gets its
news from TV and social media. So do I. And I tweet.
I have passed a tax cut. I have rocket man crying uncle. I am working on
Obamacare. ISIS is on the run. We are not in any new wars. And everyone is
scared of me. That's what the American people elected me to do. And they call me a
'f---ing moron'; I am a 'genius ... and a very stable genius at that'!
I eat fast food, get my news from TV, love social media, love to tweet, and don't read.
I am the American public. That's why I got elected first try without being in politics. I
am president and I got 10 billion bucks and I do what I say. How many of the stuffed
shirts calling me an idiot can match that? None. Now who's the dumb shit?