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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
the satire column
Porcupine's Quill
January 4, 2015
THE BUSH BUG
News Item: Jeb Bush ponders the presidential race.
You look so insignificant. Who are you and what do you do?
I live in Bushes. I make them so itchy to go to war, they make up all kinds of stories
to do it. Not their fault really, not after I've been working on them.
You mean like countries having nuclear bombs and soldiers pulling premature babies
off of respirators ...
Yes, and sometimes the lies affect their speech. It's the rational side of the brain
making a last ditch effort to stop me.
You mean like not being able to say 'nuclear'...
That and other things ...
Like what?
Well, doing silly things like becoming the backpack on a parachute jumper for your
ninetieth birthday.
What's wrong with that if it makes one happy?
Nothing. But think about it ... do you want nuts in the White House?
So why do you do it?
I hate the human race. They are destroying my environment and I can't accept it.
With the Bushes, I have killed off quite a few ...
But the new one doesn't look like a warmonger.
Wait till I work on him. This time I am hoping to get at the nuclear trigger finger. If
only I could plant one of us on Putin ...
How can we stop you?
You can't. I am a power bug.
THE BUSH BUG
News Item: Jeb Bush ponders the presidential race.
You look so insignificant. Who are you and what do you do?
I live in Bushes. I make them so itchy to go to war, they make up all kinds of stories
to do it. Not their fault really, not after I've been working on them.
You mean like countries having nuclear bombs and soldiers pulling premature babies
off of respirators ...
Yes, and sometimes the lies affect their speech. It's the rational side of the brain
making a last ditch effort to stop me.
You mean like not being able to say 'nuclear'...
That and other things ...
Like what?
Well, doing silly things like becoming the backpack on a parachute jumper for your
ninetieth birthday.
What's wrong with that if it makes one happy?
Nothing. But think about it ... do you want nuts in the White House?
So why do you do it?
I hate the human race. They are destroying my environment and I can't accept it.
With the Bushes, I have killed off quite a few ...
But the new one doesn't look like a warmonger.
Wait till I work on him. This time I am hoping to get at the nuclear trigger finger. If
only I could plant one of us on Putin ...
How can we stop you?
You can't. I am a power bug.