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The Porcupine's Quill: A Satire Column
by Arshad M. Khan
Please scroll down for
the satire column
January 3, 2021
A PALACE COUP?
News Item: There is a move by some Republican senators for Vice President Pence
to refuse to certify Biden's win.
Oh Doughnaald! Can't I still not pack?
You stay put Melania. We may not have to move.
But you lost Doughnaald ...
Don't ever say that Melania. I WON!
Okay, okay! You won. But how ...
Don't you see Republican senators have come to my aid and said Pence is with them.
How does that help, Doughnaald?
Well, Pence can refuse to certify Biden's win.
How can he do that when you lost ...
Don't, don't, don't. Don't ever say that.
Sorry Doughnaald, you won but ...
No buts, Melania. When the votes are recounted I will have won. Republican
governors will find the votes.
American elections are beginning to look like Communist elections in Eastern Europe
No, no, no! The votes are there ... the votes are there. They just have to find them.
I won, Melania. I won.
You are husband. I obey. You won. But ...
No buts, Melania.
Sorry Doughnaald. You make palace coup then, Doughnaald?
Palace coup? There are no kings in the US.
Yes Doughnaald. Can I get you a cheeseburger?
Now you're talking ... a big, fat, juicy one, Melania. The good news has given me an
Yes Doughnaald. It always helps you think straight ...